Consider this official notice
that I’m firing the head WordPress
statistician for BLATANTLY under
reporting my views last month
just because he doesn’t understand
my AWESOME poetry.
If you’d like to lead that department,
apply in the comments below. Tell me how
you’d make sure I get the TOTALLY ACCURATE
and well deserved increase in stats
for what EVERYBODY knows is the best
poetry blog on the Internet.
Salary commensurate with results.
About Bartholomew Barker
Bartholomew Barker is an organizer of Living Poetry, a collection of poets in the Triangle region of North Carolina where he has hosted a monthly feedback workshop for more than decade. His first poetry collection, Wednesday Night Regular, written in and about strip clubs, was published in 2013. His second, Milkshakes and Chilidogs, a chapbook of food inspired poetry was served in 2017. He was nominated for a Pushcart Prize in 2021. Born and raised in Ohio, studied in Chicago, he worked in Connecticut for nearly twenty years before moving to Hillsborough where he lives and writes poetry.
Bartholomew Barker, Poet 
Choose me, your stats will me UGGGGE
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I like the sound of that!
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stats, I’ve had a few
but then again ….
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Stay on my good side and I’ll make sure you get even more stats.
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đ¤ŁI donât think Iâll make the short listâŚ.Id be laughing too much đ¤Š
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This is VERY SERIOUS. No laughing or I’ll ban you from the blog. BANNEDD!!!
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ha – still sniggering but under my breath so you cant see or hear me đ
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Snicker. Do you turn orange 𧥠for free?
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I only turn orange for a fee.
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Just like TACO would. Great understudy. đ§Ąđ§Ąđ§Ą
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:D :D :D
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Why is everyone laughing? I’ve been HORRIBLY WRONGED!
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Nice read
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Thank you, Swami.
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He’s such a freaking whiner!
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That’s the biggest difference between him and me. He’s a whiner. I’m a winer.
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Don’t you mean winner?
HA HA
I”ve enjoyed this bigly
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Guess I didn’t drink enough cofefe yesterday.
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