The Four Freedoms (Revised and Amended)

For today’s prompt, write a remix poem. That is, remix one of your poems from earlier in the month. There are many ways to do this. Turn a free verse poem into a traditional form (using lines from the original poem). Or use erasure to cut down a long poem into a short one. Or expand a short poem into a longer version. Get creative with it.

The Four Freedoms (Revised and Amended)

I’m free to read my poems aloud
and you’re free not to listen.
I’ll encourage you to speak your mind
even though we won’t always agree.

I’m free to pray to any gods
I happen to find attractive
and I’ll defend your right to worship
even though I don’t believe.

But freedom requires sacrifice
not of blood on a battlefield
but in wealth to a society.
The hungry and naked are not free.

It’s no better being the fat cat,
afraid of losing his hoardings.
Let’s share so there’ll be loaves and fishes
for all and no one lives in anxiety.

Because I don’t want to be a rich man
living in an impoverished land.


(I revised my poem from Day 23. Is this version better or worse?)


About Bartholomew Barker

Bartholomew Barker is one of the organizers of Living Poetry, a collection of poets and poetry lovers in the Triangle region of North Carolina. Born and raised in Ohio, studied in Chicago, he worked in Connecticut for nearly twenty years before moving to Hillsborough where he makes money as a computer programmer to fund his poetry habit.
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6 Responses to The Four Freedoms (Revised and Amended)

  1. Lisa Tomey says:

    I like both versions, but this one seems to raise the bar.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. JeanMarie says:

    This version is much better. I thought the references to hunger and fear in the first version were a little murky. Well done sir.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. It’s really a meaningful and profound poem

    Liked by 1 person

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